What’s next

This might be a bit deep for some people, though i have been thinking about it for a while.

My question is.

What next once we die?

Everyone has their own views and thats great though i have really been thinking about this

I have died twice, once during childbirth due to blood loss and second time was from an overdose

And with both those time i didnt have a white light, or people standing there with open arms. There was nothing. Zip zilch nadda…. It was just black…..

Like dont get me wrong im in now way saying there is nothing after we die as i would really love for there to be

I did see a facebook post ages ago saying

“I wonder if the white light that we are meant to see when we die, is really us being born out of someone elses vigina ”

That post really got me thinking maybe its right? Who knows.

Id love to know other peoples thoughts

Life

People always say things happen for a reason. Do we always know what that reason is?

Is life meant to test us at every turning point? When does life get easier? What is the meaning of life?

I have these questions go through my head every single day. Most days well infact everyday i dont have an answer. I guess i just put it down to

Life is what you make it

My life has taken a massive turn. It used to be filled with DV, drugs, and mental health issues. Now its all changed

Im getting married in 15 days to a man i cant even put into words, he is loving, kind, has a big heart and the list could go on. I am carrying his daughter im 21 weeks today. And so far i havent had any complications touch wood

Im so used to everything being so shit innmy life, that i am always on edge waiting for the shoe to drop and to see what i am used to. Though you know what? Thats not going to happen. Blake is the complete opposite to any person i have ever been with. He isnt violant one bit, he doesnt treat me like shit, he doesnt expect me to wait on him hand and foot. He is truely a gentelman. His mum has done an amazing job.

I keep thinking he is going to run for the hills and decide that this life isnt for him. What i feel for him i have never felt for anyone ever before. Is this my kama finally? Is this finally my happy ending? Finally after everything i have been through am i truely allowed to be happy? I have honestly found my one and only